Dick-Tech

Just Fuckin Say, "This is my photo, have a drink and let's talk some shit!"

 

As requested by my photo instructor, class was held in the gallery at U.O.P. so we all could take a look at artist/professor Jennifer Little's work. I walked around, mumbling bullshit under my breath as I usually do because that's what I do- I talk shit about other people's work. Ms. Little's show was broken into two parts I title "Tourists" and "Bridges."

      I understand her theme, sightseeing. But that doesn’t mean I nor any other sane person wants to see your vacation photo album. She had a little too much going on and should have stayed focused. For example, she had pictures of people taking pictures. Cool...go with that.  I actually dig that because it's kind of looking at an ongoing reflection. But then there were other pictures that had people shopping in the gift shops and walking around which totally blew it. Out of all the pictures that had to do with this theme there was really only one that I could enjoy. It had a bunch of men holding their cameras as they were standing on this rock taking pictures. If you glance at it, you see men standing on a rock taking pictures. But then off to the side, you see a midget pointing his finger. A midget made the picture more interesting...a midget is all it took for me to say, "Now that picture is good." We know little people exist; we just don't see them every day. I think that's why I have such respect for that shot. The picture that could have had potential was the shot of the lady’s face staring right into the camera as a glow rose from the bottom. The lady's tobacco and alcohol look of ugliness that ran across her face made the picture but there were tons of people in the background that killed it.
            The second part of her show, “Bridges” was exactly that. Out of the 6 or 7 that she had, there was only one them that I liked....and I have no idea what the hell it was called because I never bother to look at those stupid little name plates, so I call it “Mouse Hole.” The reason why I liked the one I do so much was that it didn't show any kind of depth perception like the others had. Looking at the other photos, you, as the looker, could tell that you were the actual size that you are in real life. But the picture that I'm fond of could make you feel like you were a human size or mouse size peeping through a small hole.
            Her presentation was what it was. I understand that she couldn't spend any more money but she could have done something. I would have preferred it if she staple gunned, duck taped and nailed her pictures at the end of a broomstick off the ceiling because it would have made it more interesting rather than have it feel like looking at snapshots on a fridge door of last summer's road trip.
            With that said, I rest my case.
   

My Conversations in the Bathroom is Better than this Shit!

     I was pretty stoked on the idea of watching a movie in photo class (the past movies and clips we've watched were cool, so that assumption was made). I don't know what that man's name is, and at this point I couldn't give a fat rat's ass, but to put in plain english, this guy's lame as hell. If I were to see him on the street, I'd probably go up to him and have a conversation just to rebuttle everything he agreed with. I understand for you to be an artist you have to be somewhat "out there," but his man was just sad-and not in a good way.
     He's obsessed with nature, no biggie; but stones?  Really? He said that he has to understand the stone to realize how it works and for him to understand it, he has to become one with the stone...what the fuck?! I hate that way of thinking to begin with, but if that's what you have to do to create art, well...
     My favorite part of the entire movie was when he's sitting down at the breakfast table eating, staring out the window as his kids are running around him. This motherfucker didn't even acknowledge his kids and I thought that was the funniest thing. He just stared, drinking his coffee as his kid was was about a foot away from him. No "good morning" or "hey-" just stared like a catotonic.
     I will admit, I respect him for his passion and stubborness when it comes to his art...if you can really call it that. Some of his work that I particulary admired was his "rock seed" that was placed in different environments. But please, whatever you do, do not make me have to listen to his philosohical bullshit any longer. I rest my case.

Peek-a-Boo!

Before and After: Retouching !DISCLAIMER! This photo does not belong to me although the retouching is my work

The City Line Chronicles: Really?

I swear, there is no decency left in the world. Last night, I was sitting on the bus and heard something coming from the back so I turned my head to see what was going on. As I was glancing, I caught out the corner of my eye some mexican broad titty feeding her kid out in the open for us to see! Really?

Fuck You Snotty Building